Crucial Conversations Perspective & Strategy-Part A

Throughout the last few weeks of my course in Leading Organizational Change at Lamar University, I had the opportunity to read a very influential text called Crucial Conversations (Grenny, et al., 2012). This has given me many tools to use when I bring my implementation plan to my district. Having a strategy to handle these high stress high stake conversations is crucial because humans often struggle with regulating emotions. When confronted, our "fight or flight" response kicks in, making us either combative and defensive or hurt and withdrawn. The authors of Crucial Conversations refer to this as "telling a story" (Grenny, et al., 2012). Instead of staying calm and rational, we tend to imagine negative scenarios. This book provides powerful skills to ensure every conversation, especially difficult ones, leads to desired outcomes. It teaches readers how to be persuasive rather than abrasive, how to return to productive dialogue when others become emotional, and offers skills for mastering high-stakes conversations, regardless of the topic or person.

I've also explored what it means to be an effective leader and how to implement positive changes within an organization. Traditionally, a leader is seen as the decision-maker who guides the team without necessarily seeking collaboration. They are the go-to person for reassurance and guidance. However, I've learned that leadership is more complex than this traditional view. It starts with clearly defining and voicing our "why" to connect with others' "why." The clearer we are about our reasons for doing what we do, the more successful we will be in implementing innovative ideas.

 In terms of my own process of becoming a self-differentiated leader, I will focus on creating a blended learning environment while integrating technology in the classroom at my school. I will ensure to respectfully consider the opinions and concerns of my peers and students. I must also become adept at diffusing others' anxiety without letting it cloud my vision. Additionally, I need to respond to the inevitable challenges during the installation process in a non-anxious manner that helps ease others' discomfort. My response to these situations will help me connect with my peers meaningfully, keeping my innovation plan on track. Being a self-differentiated leader means I can conduct uncomfortable conversations, so others feel heard while maintaining meaningful connections without losing sight of my goal. Holding crucial conversations is key to being approachable while guiding and encouraging others. It fosters a growth midset when we step out of our comfort zone and approach crucial moments with openness and grace. This builds a community culture and helps diffuse anxiety, keeping our focus on our goal rather than being clouded by emotional responses. It teaches us grace in dealing with others and ourselves. Humans are complex, and we often need reminders of our goals amidst the whirlwind of emotions that come with connecting with others.

To have crucial conversations, several factors need to be addressed. First, creating a culture where people feel safe to discuss difficult issues is essential. Next, modeling how to control negative emotions during emotionally charged dialogues is crucial. Finally, staying focused on the ultimate goal throughout the conversation is important. To be a self-differentiated leader, one must work on personal growth, ensure motives are clear, and know what they want from the conversation. Becoming such a leader capable of having crucial conversations requires significant personal reflection and is an ongoing process.

The approach to high-stakes conversations includes steps like "Start with the Heart," "Learning to Look," "Making it Safe," "Mastering Your Stories," "State My Path," "Explore Others’ Paths," and "Move to Action." These steps are vital in diffusing anxiety and helping all parties feel seen and heard. Leaders who start with their heart's motive make it difficult for conversations to escalate, as they honestly state their intentions before misunderstandings arise. Self-differentiated leaders can objectively examine situations and refocus on desired results. The goal in crucial conversations is to reach a point where all parties can positively move forward with a shared perspective.

As this school year begins, I will be utilizing an approach rooted in self-differentiated leadership and focused on having successful crucial conversations. By using both approaches in tandem, I know I will be able to lead my school in implementing my plan and foster an environment that is prime for both lifelong learning and strong, successful differentiated leaders. I aim to use crucial conversations to help each of my team members feel comfortable implementing a blended learning environment. I hope to guide us in developing a shared perspective that creating a significant learning environment is key to fostering a lifelong love for learning for each student at our campus. I plan to model these conversations through our weekly WIG meetings, monthly staff meetings, and conversations with coworkers and students. 

I know the road ahead will not be easy, but I believe that what I have learned in these last few weeks has already set me on a path to successfully implement my plan. The skills I have gained throughout this course have proven to be priceless as I have already begun to reflect on how I conduct myself at work, the conversations I choose to engage in, and the environment I will be creating within my classroom. I believe the energy we give off is contagious, so with the vital skills gained in this course, it will be exciting to see how it further creates a ripple effect in conducting the change we wish to see within our organizations. If you are trying to bring about change in your organization, letting your negative emotions get in the way of the conversation can damage your reputation and integrity as an influencer. However, I appreciate that one of the steps in the Crucial Conversations model is to “start with your heart” (Grenny et al., 2021). As we’ve discussed in this program, starting with your heart ensures that your intentions are clear and aligned with your values.